Difficult Takes A Day Impossible Takes A Week

It’s the simple things in life that are often the hardest to master. Seems crazy, right? I mean the simplest things should be well… Simple. I mean, it hard things are considered to be hard because they are difficult or take some time, thought and energy to complete. While on the other hand, something is considered to be simple because it is easy or doesn’t take too much thought, time or energy to complete. Simple reasoning and logic right? Wrong. You see, people are wired differently. You may see something and interpret it one way and yet I can see the very same thing at the very same time and get a totally different perspective on it or the situation. This is what makes us unique and different.

What I’m getting at is that social media and other factors have somewhat taken away that free-thinking, different perspective having mentality that we once had. Now I can’t blame this all on social media. This has been happening way before the digital age. I believe it’s referred to as the mob mentality? Don’t quote me on that. Actually, hold on, let me google it right quick. Mobbbbbb Mennnn taaaaa llittty…. yep, its the mob mentality. According to Wikipedia; herd mentality and mob mentality, also lesser known as gang mentality, describes how people can be influenced by their peers to adopt certain behaviors on a largely emotional, rather than rational, basis. Remember the Salem witch trials? Mob mentality. Let’s take it all the way back. Remember Jesus and nem? Mob mentality.

It’s especially easier to whip up a frenzy en masse with this generation. Because of the internet and its ability to literally reach people worldwide, what you say does have power. For example, right now there is someone in Sweden or Japan or the Netherlands or Turkey or Cleveland or wherever you are right now that is listening to me as I drivel on and on about whatever it is that I’m talking about right now. My words have power. And so do yours. Use them wisely. Like my Man Uncle Ben told Peter Parker; with great power comes great responsibility. Coincidently Jesus told a certain Peter this same thing…Look it up. Luke chapter 12 verses 41 through 48. 48 in particular.

But anyway, back to the simple things. The simple thing for me that seems to be the hardest for me to do is meet new people. It is like so nerve racking for me to go to a complete stranger and be all like “hey, how are you? I’m Will. What’s your name? Do you want to be my friend?” Sounds and feels weird as hell. It’s crazy because I’m a grown ass man that can’t is afraid to simply say ‘hi’ to someone in the elevator. Shit’s scary, B.

All of these crazy scenarios play in my head like what if I sound like a wacko? Or what if they ignore me, then I’ll be stuck here staring awkwardly off into space trying not to make eye contact as this elevator slowly creeps it’s way to the 22nd floor. Or what if, God forbid, she’s a chatty Kathy and *gasp* by me saying hello I’ve just opened the floodgates and now she’ll talk me to death? Just stay quiet… So that’s what I do. Keep quiet and try not to make eye contact by playing with my phone, counting the ceiling or floor tiles. Anything.

Then I get off the elevator and more scenarios run through my head like “ why didn’t you say something when she smiled at you? What If she wasn’t some wacko chatty Kathy? *gasp* what if she was the one and you squandered your chance? Crap.

The point is that In life we don’t get many do-overs or second chances. You must seize the moment when it comes. That is what I aim to do. Seize the moment and live for the day. I hope this wasn’t too jumbled or discombobulated. I’m just trying to get the thoughts from my head to this page as quickly and seamlessly as possible. Not sure if it’s working or not though…

Yeezy Taught Me

Yesterday, well the past 2 days, I was in a funk. I needed to get out of it and quick. I can’t live like that. I was doing too well and feeling too good to revert back.

I had to shake this feeling so I turned to my favorite activity. Listening to music. Music gets me out of the bad place. Specifically Kanye. For some reason I feel a connection to his music and vibe. I understand him and he understands me.

People talk bad about Kanye and call him crazy but to me he’s just misunderstood. When I feel misunderstood I can listen to some Kanye and know that someone else gets it. If there’s nobody else that gets me, Kanye gets me.

Now that I think about it, I could be in a bad place because I missed my last 2 therapy appointments. The first one was on me and my poor scheduling but the last one was on him… I’ll get back right sooner or later. Hopefully sooner rather than later.

I think I just exerted too much energy this week and last week. Went to see Black Panther on last Thursday, Friday, Saturday and Sunday. Then I went to see my dad (in my head) Spike Lee’s School Daze on Monday. It’s all catching up to me now and I’m crashing. Too much extroverting.

Networking & Stuff…

So I decided to take that leap and head out to this networking event for other black bloggers/podcasters and the like. I was hella nervous because I was going alone and would be in a room full of strangers. Anxiety levels through.the.roof! Y’all know I talk myself out of doing anything that is remotely outside of my comfort zone but I went anyway. I gotta get out of my own way.

Y’all… I’m so glad I went! I had a chance to meet some great people and well ya know, network. I arrived like an hour late due to some other foolishness. Sometimes Netflix can be the devil. Anyway. When I first arrived and came up the stairs of the place I saw all these beautiful black people talking to each other and stuff. I didn’t have butterflies in my stomach they were big ass bald eagles flying around in there! I wanted to turn around and go back downstairs, out the door that I came in and head home but I couldn’t. See, I promised myself that I would step out more, I’m already here and if I left what story would I have to tell you? Nah. I’ll just stick it out.

After some initial awkward moments , I’m such a male version of Issa, I was able to get into the flow and met some really cool people and potential collaborators. I’m looking forward to the next Meetup and Working with the people I met this time.

This is my first major ‘stepping out’ event of the year. I was supposed to go last month but had another engagement. This actually gave me a little boost of confidence that I can actually do a meet and greet and not die.

Moving On

Today is the last day at my current job. Yep. It’s time for me to move on to bigger and hopefully better things. It’s kind of a bittersweet moment. While starting over can be a pain I’m not averse to it. I’m fine with starting over from scratch if things aren’t working. I’m leaving because this new job is a better position for me and that’s cool but mainly because I feel that I’m not being appreciated for all that I do.

I have never been the type to only do things for the applause or accolades but, damn a thank you for your hard work or for going above and beyond every now and again can’t hurt. Respect my time and what I bring to the table.

When I put in my resignation that’s when they want to ask what they can do to keep me and that they’re going to miss me blah blah blah. Save all of that for the next person. I’m done. I really do hate to walk away from this situation as is but I gotta do what’s best for me. This new position is with a company that seems to be a better fit for me. While I’m still an introvert and this company is uber extroverted I think I can find my niche or compromise a bit. I mean I have decided to be more open this year, right? We’ll see…